Whether you're a bride or a bridesmaid, it's normal to have anxiety about your appearance before an event as big as a wedding. Here's how to handle it.
We've all heard horror stories of brides obsessing over their bodies before their wedding day, or requesting their bridesmaids to do the same… Unfortunately, it's all too common. From mandatory dieting, to bridesmaids being kicked out of the wedding because they supposedly don't look good in their dress – feeling confident can be hard, especially when there isn't support available around you.
Weddings are supposed to be a time of celebration, of your union and of the people who've been with you along the way. So as far as we're concerned, there's no better way to celebrate being a bride or bridesmaid, than by feeling good about yourself. And making sure those around you feel wonderful too. With that attitude in mind, let's jump into all the ways you can be a body-positive bride or bridesmaid on, and leading up to your wedding day.
How to Bring Body Positivity to Your Wedding Day
1. Acknowledge that all your friends have different body types when choosing bridesmaid dresses.
This is a crucial one. Yes, your best mate will wear anything you tell them to, because they love you. But no one wants to be in the spotlight as a wedding guest, feeling like they don't look their best.
The mismatched bridesmaids dress trend is often a great way to combat this, as it allows you to keep everyone uniform, but with the option to pick the best silhouette/colour for each bridesmaid. If you're the bride, simply select a colour, or theme, a few guidelines and then let your girls pick what's best for them.
2. Never underestimate the power of a genuine compliment.
Whether you're the bride or a bridesmaid, authentically complimenting those around you is a great way to keep the body-positive energy flowing. In the months before the wedding and on the day-of, you'll be spending lots of time with the wedding party. Being around a group of fabulous ladies is the perfect time to compliment the fantastic and unique things you love about each of them.
3. Pick a dress in the size you wear today.
Set yourself up to feel good. There's always been pressure for brides to lose weight before the wedding (which, for the record, we don't believe in). But far too often, brides and bridesmaids pick dresses in smaller sizes in the hope that (by extreme dieting) they'll be able to fit into them when the wedding date comes around.
Besides possibly setting yourself up not to look your best in a too-small dress, you're actively trying to change yourself instead of embracing what you currently have (and what your future spouse, if you're the bride, obviously loves). Instead, go the body-positive route and select the correct size that your bridal stylist suggests. The mental anguish you'll avoid altogether will be so worth it.
4. Surround yourself with positive vibes only when dress shopping.
This goes for both brides and bridesmaids. If you're the bride, avoid bringing people who you know won't make your experience positive (like that aunt who always mentions how your curvy bum must've come from the other side of the family…!). As the bride, the team you assemble for your special dress shopping experience should be made up of the people who are going to champion and empower you.
If you've been chosen to help find a wedding dress as a bridesmaid, this is a big honour and will be so much fun. Therefore, the energy you bring should certainly be positive. The bride asked you to come because she values your opinion, so be a cheerleader for her during this special experience.
As the bride tries on dresses, think about how you phrase your advice. For example, if she comes out in a dress you don't believe is right, instead of saying, "That dress makes you look big,". Say something like, "That's a gorgeous dress, but I think there's something even better and more flattering for you." Giving your opinions in a body-positive way will make the bride feel supported and set the tone for others to follow.
5. Say "no" to diet talk.
A wedding is the perfect place for diet culture to rear its ugly head. Whether you're dieting or not, constantly talking about what you're putting into your body will negatively affect those around you, whether you realise it or not. If you say, "I can't have a piece of cake, carbs go straight to my thighs," those around you will start thinking about whether they should have some cake. Instead, shift the conversation towards a more productive and positive direction.
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